BEING REAL

Our sisterhood is a fun bunch and we know how to laugh and make each other giggle. Whether it's talking about mismatched socks, menopause or any other off the wall thing that pops into our heads, our hearts are united. Every single one of us in this special sisterhood has had to deal with their own hurts and heartaches. I love about being a part of this group. For me personally, when I was dealing with my Mom's terminal cancer and planning her funeral and simultaneously dealing with Dave's unexpected cancer diagnosis and his surgery, y'all were here for me! Your words of encouragement, prayers and cards have lifted me up during my darkest times. Our wonderful pastor reminds us all the time that God created us for relationship. Though I have only met face to face with one of the sisters (Cyndi), you could put me in a crowded room with a blindfold on and my heart would gravitate to each and every one of you! Only God knew what this group would come to embody and the impact we would make!

I used to think that life sailed along with an occasional pot hole here and there but now I realize that life is an ongoing journey of detours and road construction. The smooth sailing is more the exception than the rule. I despise traffic, it seems like such a waste of my time to sit in this stop and go, barely advancing line of cars and usually I find myself irritable and thinking, "Someone else's lack of consideration and selfishness has inconvenienced SO many people!" Yeah, not a lot of compassion, grace or mercy! I am JUST as selfish thinking of how this inconveniences ME!
Last night, the socks and I attended the new Bible Study at our church titled, "UNGLUED". Right from the get go I realized I am going to have my work cut out for me! The author points out that we are to be making imperfect progress. Then she makes a bold statement, "How you react, impacts your reach". I am a reactor, so much so you could probably hang one of those hazardous signs on my back to warn people ahead of time that you need to watch out for "fallout". Most days I am pretty good but other days, I don't care who is on the receiving end of my tirade!
Just a couple of days ago, I was at LOWES and because Dave has been a defensive driving instructor for the BNSF Railway, we have had the importance of backing into our parking spaces stressed repeatedly! (For the record, those couple of extra seconds that it takes, reduces your likelihood of backing into someone or being hit as you back out of your own parking space.) The key to backing into your parking space however is that you need to leave yourself enough room so that you can load your stuff into the back of your vehicle. I came out of LOWES with a bulky ceiling fan in my cart and couldn't believe my eyes when I saw that some HUGE, honkin', diesel truck had extended WAAAY into my space right next to my bumper!! Yup, NUCLEAR FALLOUT!!! As I wrestled and wrangled that ceiling fan into the back of my car I manged to write the nastiest mental note known to man!! After parking my cart, I grabbed my notebook and wrote a note to the owner of the truck. As I grabbed the door handle to get out of my car and put the note underneath the windshield wiper, the Holy Spirit checked me. Don't you hate it sometimes when He does that? As idiotic as it sounds, sometimes I just WANT to be angry! However, I have learned the value of being obedient to the Holy Spirit's leading and I wadded up my piece of paper and drove off. Did I have a legitimate gripe, absolutely! Did I have the right to spill "written vomit" all over another person, ummm NO, I do not! "Imperfect progress" at it's best! It would be great to have the Jesus-appropriate response first but as I said, I have my work cut out for me!
This week we received the news that Dave's 3rd and final lab workup indicates that his cancer has returned somewhere. He will begin radiation as soon as we get the details ironed out. How did I react? Not so good! I thought we had licked this thing and it was behind us, after all, Dave IS my Superman! Once again I feel like our future is threatened; being someone that God had to heal from all of their insecurity issues, this feels like regression to me. I truly believe that God has me in this new Bible Study for a reason. As we read over King Jehosophat's response to the armies marching against him, he employed a bold tactic. Rather than sending out his version of Army Rangers or Navy Seals, he sent out the equivalent of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir!!!! Singers went out before them, singing the Lord's praises and shouting of His unending faithfulness to His people! I can't help but think of God inhabiting the praises of His people and how that makes all the difference in how we either REACT or IMPACT.

My time with the sock adventure has come to a close. The Texas sock will be making an appearance next week, watch for it in the mail! Love you all!