Faith In Time Of Testing

As most of you know we have been blessed with two daughters. Madeline, who is seven, was born in July 2004...a "textbook" pregnancy with no problems or complications, I delivered here at our local hospital and life was perfect (still is!). You hear about terrible tragedies or trials that happen to other people and you're glad it's not you. In fact, you convince yourself that it would never happen to you...and for most, that is usually true.

It was awhile before I wanted to have another baby...Madeline has always been a joy to have but I was not prepared to think about having another until she was about three. In March 2008 I found out I was pregnant and the day after it was confirmed by my doctor I started to bleed. I went to the ER since it was after hours although I wish I had not gone...they couldn't do anything for me other than take blood. The next few days were spent not knowing if I was still pregnant or not, although my body was telling me I was because I was still having symptoms. We prayed a LOT and I fully believed that this baby would be born healthy and whole a few months later. After a couple of weeks that consisted of worry, prayer, taking it easy and an ultrasound (where an insensitive tech told me there was "absolutely nothing there"...gee thanks!) I took another home pregnancy test on the advice of my cousin who is an L&D nurse. It was negative and that's when I knew we were not getting the miracle we had hoped for.

It was hard and I was mad at God for awhile, wondering why this had to happen, and why weren't my prayers enough. I will never know until I'm in Heaven one day (and reunited with my baby) exactly why things happened the way they did, but three years later I can look back and see good things that happened as a result. Doesn't make it better but I can see that God's plan is better than mine. Had I still been pregnant I would have been due the end of October...but instead we were able to go to Scotland that October to see my Gran and other family members. I never would have gone on that trip that year if I had been pregnant and who knows if I would have made it to Scotland before my Gran passed away in 2009. In fact, 2008 was the year that my Dad and Uncle reunited after not speaking for 25 years over a silly matter that was made worse by interfering family members who told lies to both my Dad and Uncle. By October 2008 my Dad was in regular contact with 3 of his 7 siblings, something he hadn't had (or wanted to have) in years.

And...had I been pregnant in 2008 I would not have had Olivia in 2009 and I certainly can't imagine life without her though we also faced that possibility.

I found out in January 2009 that I was pregnant and almost immediately I was battling morning sickness...worse than I ever had with Madeline. January and February were pretty much a write off for me...sick all the time, asleep in the chair by 6pm...poor Andy and Madeline! I was told though that the sickness was a good sign of a pregnancy that would "stick" so I put up with it as best I could. When March rolled around things improved greatly and I felt like my old self again and I looked forward to an easy few months...after all, my pregnancy with Madeline had gone smoothly.

My "only" ultrasound was booked for Apr.22nd (my doctor only had one ultrasound done unless there was a problem) and we assumed all was fine so we were really only looking to find out if it was a boy or girl. We were sent to an ob/gyn in the city...he is the best there is and the only one who will tell parents the sex of the baby. While he was checking things out I heard him say the words "birth defect". My heart went into my throat but then I convinced myself that I had heard him wrong. Because Olivia was in the wrong position we were asked to leave for an hour and then come back and he would finish. He also said he would be calling our doctor and that's when I knew things weren't right. He explained what he had seen and though I don't remember him using the term "omphalocele" I knew from his description what it was. A few years before I had watched a show about births (filmed mainly in Toronto) and I naively thought "No problem...they'll just do surgery and all will be fine". I think it's because of watching that show that I was so calm. We walked out telling each other it was going to be okay, God was in charge and all would be well.

The next day we had an appointment with our family doctor and that is when things changed for me...he told me I would need to go to Toronto to have the baby and would be having appointments there. For some reason this news upset me more than the news of the day before but he was impressed by how calm we were.

We slowly told people what was going on...close friends and family were told right away and bit by bit we told people. I think we did that mainly because we were hoping for a miracle before we had to let everyone know and also because we wanted people who we knew had a strong faith and a belief in miracles praying.

Some days I would have lots of faith and decide that everything would be okay and others I would be full of despair. Those days were usually after a visit to Toronto...they would bombard us with information and tell us the worst case scenarios. Hardest to hear was that Olivia could die, especially if she was unlucky enough to have trisomy 18, which combined with omphalocele is fatal.

If you want to know the full story of the doctor's visits, etc. then please go to www.carepages.com/carepages/journeyofbabyc. It's all there for you to read. To make a long story short, Olivia was born on Aug. 28th (three days before her due date) in Toronto. For a baby that they said would be in hospital for 6 weeks to a year or more, she spent 12 days in the NICU, 8 days on the surgical floor and was sent home at 20 days old to grow and wait for surgery, which was done on June 2nd, 2010. To look at her today you would never know what she had been through unless you saw the scar on her tummy.

I know that there are people who think our prayers were not answered but they are wrong. Our prayers WERE answered...just maybe not in the way we wanted, but I wouldn't change the outcome. Olivia did not have the many problems that a lot of omphalocele babies have...and there are some who die before or after birth, but many have heart problems, etc. Olivia did spend time in the hospital, but not the months and years that some babies do. Oliva's "O" (guess I forgot to explain that an omphalocele is when some of the organs are outside the abdomen in a sac...Olivia's contained her liver and some of her intestines) moved inside quite a bit in the first four months which is one reason why I feel her surgery took just less than two hours than the four hours it was supposed to.

If it hadn't been for Olivia's O there are many people we would not have met and one gentleman that Andy met in the NICU waiting room when Olivia was three days old needed prayer...and Andy was able to share with him and pray for him and his family. He and his wife had their first baby a couple of days after Olivia and a few hours after he was born he was taken to SickKids for a problem they didn't know about before he was born. He had surgery when he was two days old. The interesting thing about meeting this man...I had met his wife earlier that day (finally put two and two together when I met the husband) and we learned they lived 45 minutes away from us and the husband grew up in our city and went to the same high school as my husband. 9 months later when Olivia had her surgery guess who was in the constant obs room with her? Their baby! This past June when I went for her clinic appointment, guess who I ran into in the hallway? This SAME family! Definitely a God connection!

I believe that both of my daughters have a special purpose that God has given them...it will take time to fully realize what that purpose is but both of them have already been used by God in various ways.

One passage that meant a lot to me during my pregnancy with Olivia is Psalm 139, starting at verse 13:

13 For you eformed my inward parts;

you fknitted me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.1

gWonderful are your works;

my soul knows it very well.

15 hMy frame was not hidden from you,

when I was being made in secret,

intricately woven in ithe depths of the earth.

16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;

in your jbook were written, every one of them,

the days that were formed for me,

when as yet there was none of them.

The Next Chapter Of My Life

In spring of 2002, after months of hardly going to church and not liking it even when I did go I happened to hear about a new church (well, new to me, anyways). My friend Lois and I used to go walking about 2 or 3 nights a week and we would talk about all kinds of things, and my not going to church came up. Lois told me about a church she had been attending and she invited me to come..I knew the pastor and his wife (they are friends of the family) and I decided I would try it out.

The church was small, but that was okay, and from day one I felt loved and accepted there and I was there every Sunday I could be (when I wasn't already working). It was a church unlike any other I had been in...I had been raised in the Baptist church and this church was Pentecostal but what really made it different from the others was the laid back feel to the service (nothing was planned, i.e. sing 2.5 hymns and do a call to worship) and it was led by the Spirit. If one Sunday the pastor felt led to have us sing for most of the service, we did. Or, if he felt led to have testimonies (or sometimes they would just keep happening), we did. Not only that, the pastor taught from the Bible...no prepared sermons or series, he studied his Bible every day and throughout the week and sometimes not until Sunday morning did God impress upon him what he wanted him to speak about.

This is where I learned the most important lesson I've ever learned from God and I feel quite strongly about it...so much so that this verse is my FAVOURITE in all the Bible. It doesn't make other verses less important, but this one is so critical to our lives I believe. I learned about tithing and the verses in Malachi 3.

My pastor was willing to talk about a subject that I hadn't heard in my years in the Baptist church and I learned a basic principle that has blessed me many times over and still does. I had not been a tither because I thought I couldn't afford to...how wrong was I! I decided to try it and it was very hard at first but there have been SO many times that I've been blessed...not just because I've received but I've actually been more blessed by giving. There is an excellent book by Robert Morris called "The Blessed Life" and I've been re-reading it recently because even though I'm a consistent and faithful tither, I want to be even more free with what I have been given. It's a process and I'm still working on this aspect. :0)

Another thing that came from attending this new church was that I met Andy. I knew of him from another church I had attended but we had never actually been introduced (and nothing would have happened then because I would have been 14 and he would have been 23...my parents would NEVER have approved of that!

My pastor's wife is a bit of a matchmaker so she kept inviting me to their house (Andy was living with them at the time) and we became friends. In August we went on our first date (although at the time we were just calling it "going out for coffee". A coffee date that lasted 5 hours at Starbucks. LOL In November we were "officially" dating and on Christmas Eve Andy gave me a promise ring and in February we were engaged...we got married in September! It was a bit of a whirlwind but we both knew that we loved each other and were meant to be together...so why wait? It's hard to believe we've been married for 8 years...I'm not sure where the time has gone!

When I met Andy he was going through some of the same things I was (a few months earlier and he started going to the church not long before I did)...he hadn't been going to church very much, was disappointed with the way his life was going, etc. and our pastor told him to get back into his Bible, get back to church, basically get his life in order and God would start to change things. That's exactly what happened...once we both got back to church, studying our Bibles (and making changes in our lives that we needed to) we found each other and the rest, as they say, is history...

8. Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed me. But ye say, Wherein have we robbed thee? In tithes and offerings. 9. Ye [are] cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed me, [even] this whole nation. 10. Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that [there shall] not [be room] enough [to receive it]. 11. And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes, and he shall not destroy the fruits of your ground; neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith the Lord of hosts.

My journey

Obviously, I am still learning many things about God and His Word but I think I've learned a few things along the way...if only I could remember everything I've learned when I'm in a new trial...perhaps I wouldn't stress so much.

As I've already mentioned, I grew up in the church. I went to Sunday school, was baptized when I was 12, went to youth group...all those things. Did they make me a "perfect" Christian? No, of course not. What it did was give me a foundation, whether I fully realized it or not at the time.

When I was 21 I went on a mission trip to Halifax, Nova Scotia with the youth group and I fell in love with the place. At the time of the trip I was unhappy...I felt stuck in a rut, I was still living at home and I wanted a change. After my trip out East I started thinking about moving there...a HUGE step of faith but day by day there were nudgings and signs that this was the path my life was taking. I quit my job, went out a month ahead of time with a friend to hand out resumes and my parents thought I was crazy...it was a tense time in our household, but I knew this was what I was supposed to do no matter how crazy it seemed.

I moved in November 1997 (I went on the train) and when I got to Halifax I had a place to stay for a month, no job and only about 5 people that I knew. I was homesick but my pride wouldn't let me give up and go home even though that offer was there. My Dad understood better than my Mom the need to go...I was the same age as he was when he came to Canada.

The lady I was staying with was a relative of people I knew at home and she lived three doors up from the church we had been partnered with that summer so I immediately got involved in the church. I still remember my first night there..I had arrived on the train that afternoon and that evening I went to the evening service at the church where I met Janet...she invited me to her house for tea and I met her husband and family and we've been friends ever since. It meant so much to have that first friendship in my new home.

It took almost a month to find a job and I learned a lot about trusting God for provision...and He did provide! He also provided a job which although it wasn't what I wanted and there were days I hated it, I did it and did a good job. Two months later I had a full-time job in another store that I loved.

In all, I spent four years out East...two in Halifax and two in Moncton, New Brunswick. I made many great friends and I learned a lot. Not only did I get out on my own and learned to make it on my own (with God's help) but it was also the first time in my life that I went to a church that I chose and I feel it was where I started to add to the foundation of my faith. I certainly needed faith to get through those first few rough months but as hard as it was, it was such a good lesson for me.

After four years I ended up back at home, helping Mom and Dad at the restaurant, and settling back into life at home. While I was happy I was also longing for more...I was going to church off and on although I seemed to spend more time away from church than in it. The church I had always gone to with Mom didn't seem to "fit" yet I was not keen to go looking for a new church...it just seemed easier not to go. It wasn't that I was mad at God or anything...I just didn't know where I wanted to go until one day a friend of mine invited me to go to a church she had begun attending...that invite changed my life completely...in more ways than one.

One of the verses that meant a lot to me during these few years is Philippians 4:19

And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

There are many verses that spoke to me but this one I tested more than once, and though at times it felt like God was late, I know that He never was, and He was always faithful. I also learned that this verse doesn't just mean financial need...that first night in Halifax when God knew I needed a friend, He sent one to me.

In The Beginning...

"Let's start at the very beginning...a very good place to start." Maria, from "The Sound Of Music"

I was fortunate to grow up in a Christian family, although I've never known my Dad to attend church (hang on...I'll explain that). My Mom was raised in the church...my grandparents were both believers and took their four children to church every Sunday...two of their four kids still attend church. My grandmother was of the mindset that women only wore dresses...no pants. Wonder what she would think about the jeans I wear to church...or that our pastor doesn't wear a suit? To me it's not about what you wear...but I digress.

My Dad, he was born and raised in Scotland and I really don't know what my grandparents beliefs were...they didn't take their eight children to church and my grandfather was an alcoholic and a gambler and my gran worked hard to earn money to make up for what my grandfather wasted. Because of the distance I didn't know my grandparents as well as my Mom's parents, but I still have great memories of them and I believe that one day I will see them in Heaven (there is a verse that I claim for that but I need to look it up...I'll share it once I confirm the passage).

My Dad came to Canada in 1971 two short weeks after he came close to losing his life in a terrible accident. He's a Glasgow Rangers fan and he and his younger brother Jim were at the game...in those days they would fit about 100,000 people in (standing room only) and he said whenever he would leave the stadium he could lift his feet and be carried down the stairs because there were so many people. On January 2nd, 1971 the Rangers were playing their biggest rivals, Celtic (another Glasgow team). There are no other sports rivalries like this one...it's not just team against team, but Catholic against Protestant and the fans of the two teams were always separated in the stadium. The score was 0-0 and Celtic scored with only a couple of minutes to go in the game. Rangers fans started to leave, my Dad and Uncle included, heading down stairwell #13. When they got to the bottom they heard the Rangers fans cheer...they had scored to equalize the game. They debated whether or not to go back up and decided not too. I know without a doubt that decision saved their life. Moments later something happened (various theories) and people started piling on the people in front of them and people (kids included) were crushed from the weight of the crowd. From reports that I've read and what my Dad and Uncle have told me, I believe they were just ahead of this...they walked away not knowing what was happening. 66 people lost their life today, including my Dad's aunt's (by marriage) brother John.

This past January was the 40th anniversary of that fateful day and had my Dad died that day I would most certainly not be here...it's a sobering thought, but I know that God saved him. When Dad came to Canada he met Mom and at some point he became a Christian and was involved in the church until one day somebody said something to him that he didn't like and he never went back to church.

My Mom met a guy in the late 60's...he was an upstanding Christian...active in the church, gave his testimony and they fell in love and got married in 1971. On their wedding night he wanted nothing to do with her, and for the next few months her life was a living hell. Around other people he was loving towards her and talked about how they wanted to start a family but in private he belittled her and their relationship was never consummated. I don't know when or how she figured it out, but one night at church her friend asked her how she was doing...she knew something wasn't right...and Mom told her about her husband...he was gay and had married her to cover up his lifestyle. Mom and her friend confronted him and told him to get out and when Mom went back a few hours later, he was gone. It was hard for her because they had gotten married in Mom's home church and everybody knew him and back then it wasn't something that was talked about like it is today. When I first learned about this 10 years ago I was shocked because I had no idea, but it certainly explained why Mom was touchy about certain things or comments.

Mom and Dad met in 1973 and were married four days before Christmas that year. I was born in January 1976 and my brother came along in 1981. The very first Bible verse I ever learned was John 3:16...Mom and Dad had a plaque on the wall above their bed and when I was learning to read I learned that verse and have never forgotten it. It seems like a somewhat simple verse, simple idea, but it is that simple! I think we sometimes make our faith more complicated than it needs to be. God loves us. Jesus died for us. If we believe that we'll have everlasting life.

As I said, I was blessed to grow up in the church but as I've learned (and I'll talk more about another day) as good as it is to learn about God when we're younger, it's not the same as really learning about Him when we're older...when we're ready for a relationship...but I'm glad I had a good base for my faith but I was older before I learned some of my favourite verses, before he became "my God" and not just the God everybody told me about through my years growing up.

P.S. If you would like to learn more about the Ibrox disaster (and there have been a couple) you can check out this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ibrox_disaster. Below is a picture of the stairwell after the game...some of the metal railings were bent from the force of all the people. At some point during this week I'll tell some more about my Dad and my Uncle...this tragedy is part of their story...their years of not speaking and how their relationship was restored!

Happy Anniversary Julie and Andy

dear julie...such a nice anniversary gift that you have, with the arrival of the sister hood bible!
we want to wish you a very happy anniversary for sure...eight years and you are still in love and the lord has given to you and andy two precious children!
the sisters all love you and join in the happy congratulations!!

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

9Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
10For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
11Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
12And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

The Bible Has Landed!

The mailman brought a nice surprise this morning...the Scarf Sister Bible! What a nice smelling package it was...Felisol included a little sachet of lavendar from her garden...makes me want to get on a plane and go visit her!

Originally I wasn't going to be a part of this Bible journey...I just felt I had nothing to share with you all and so I decided I shouldn't take part. It's a long story and I'm sure throughout the next 7 days I'll explain it to you. About a month or so ago I regretted my decision since things have been so different the past few months and so I asked Mrs. Mac if I could join in and she said yes! :0)

I look forward to sharing my favourite and most meaningful verses with you over the next few days!

For Dear Diane And Daddy's Family

dearest diane..truly your precious daddy and mama and terry are meeting and having sweet conversation with the lord....

Psalm 116:15
Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints

love from all of your sisters

Happy Birthday To Our Little Texas Rose

today is connie's birthday and so dear sister, we wish you a very happy one...this cake was swiped from google images but really i thought with the name on it and all that surely it was made for YOU!



have a very blessed lords day on this your birthday, our little yellow rose of texas!


and here is a song for you by one of your favourite singers..



love from all of your sisters connie.......we love you!

The circle is ended

Day seven

I see from the records the the Scarf Sister's Bible has travelled around the world for a year these days. It's the best book I've ever read. Verses important to sisters who are important to me, highlighted and smiling against me while I'm reading.
Also the joy when some of the words I'd like to include in the story of my Christian life are "free".

I stopped with me getting baptised and then leaving home in 1968. That was what most young people had to do those days after finishing High School to get a further education. Both my Mom and Dad were eager not to see me go, but to see me creating a life for myself. I first worked for a year as a gardener, a teacher and finally as a nurse aid in a psychiatric ward.
I was so very much in doubt which way to choose. I remember praying the Lord for management and finally applied for a place at two schools, teaching school and nursing school for the mentally challenged. I prayed the Lord to open the door the way he wanted me to go. It shouldn't be that easy; I was admitted to both schools.
I chose the nursery school, my heart lay there. After three years at nursery school, I took a year learning special pedagogy, so I kind of got both educations anyway.



The words which have been of strength and comfort in this and similar situations are God's own promises in the book of Isaiah:
Isaiah 45:² I will go before you
and will level the mountains;
I will break down gates of bronze
and cut through bars of iron.
³ I will give you hidden treasures,
riches stored in secret places,
so that you may know that I am the LORD,
the God of Israel, who summons you by name.

I worked hard for 18 years. As for most people my life went up and down. I had some flings and even more serious relationship, but it never really clicked. I had victories and defeats in my carrier as a nurse, I was early clear about I had to choose the side of the weak and defenceless, and that didn't always match with climbing a carrier ladder. I found a place and a position where I could work without having to make compromises on behalf of the children. I bought a flat and then a semi detached house and planned to share it with my brother, when Gunnar happened. My life is divided into three epochs, childhood in Sauda, professional carrier and Gunnar giving me baby Serina.

It was a blessing I hadn't even prayed for. I always thought there were so many children (and adults) in the world needing my love and attention, that having a baby actually wasn't a concious need in me.
Phillipians 4:¹⁹ And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.
Even if it was a need I wasn't aware of, the best, but also most challenging epoch of my life began when I was 38 years and baby Serina was born and Gunnar and I married in that order.

Gunnar was a teacher in Junior High, and one of his subjects from university was religion, with emphasis on Lutheran Evangelical teaching .

We unanimously agreed that Serina should decide for herself what to do about belonging to a church or which baptism to take when she was old enough to do so. I'd never really belonged to a church, I had been moving around for so many years, but I always felt at home both in the Church of Norway and with the Pentecostal Church. We brought Serina to Sunday school, choirs and celebrations both places, but most often in the local Church of Norway(the evangelic Lutheran).
She wasn't old before she asked us, why she wasn't Christened. We answered frankly that we felt that people should decide for themselves both to follow Jesus and find a church for their home.Discussion over, we thought.


Till one day shortly before the age of seven Serina came into the kitchen with her arms akimbo and said, "I have decided." "What???" "I want to get baptised now. I do believe in Jesus like you told me. " "But where?" "In the Church of Rossaboe of course."( Local Church of Norway). She was so convincing and I had no choice but to keep my promises. I had a long talk with Gunnar and a minister friend of mine and later made an appointment with the minister at the local church. I had to be honest with him. I told I was baptised as a grown up and thought that was the right thing to do, but our daughter had decided she had made a choice to be a Christian and therefore wanted to be baptised in the church she knew the best.


I also told him about the episode at bedtime when she was 4. Serina out of the blue asked "Mom, how far away is God?" I hesitated for a moment and then the verse from Psalm 121 came, "The Lord is thy keeper, The Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand." "Is it really true Mom, she laughed, while waving her right arm in the lamp light making shadows on the wall, "Is God here, and here, and here?"
She laughed with joy, and I found my Bible and read the verse once more, " "The Lord is thy shade upon thy right hand."


The minister was a friendly and wise guy. He said Serina could be baptised in his church and he would ask her directly if this was her wish, both before under under the ceremony. This way it would be an act of faith.
Gunnar, my mother, my sister in law and I were Godparents. I would only allow Godparents I could be sure to keep their obligations; to pray for the child and be responsible that she was brought up to stay in her Christian faith. My only sibling, brother Kel, aged 43, was baptised the same day.


The sermon was held over Psalm 121. Serina even got a candle from my friend monastery brother Ole, with her name inscribed and the Psalm 121.


Though complicated, I've never doubted nor regretted this act.
It has been a blessing and a rock in the winds that soon were to come.
Serina got her first epilepsy attack not long after, and had to go on medications till she was 17. She did not have more attacks, but those medications were a heavy burden in themselves. Now she's healed and got her driver's license at 18, even before most of her friends.
Now she's out in the world to get an education. She has assured me, she's prayed the Lord to guide her every step of the way. That means she's safe.

Psalm 91:¹¹" For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;
¹² they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone. "
Deb, I see this is your psalm, forgive me for blending in.

I'll stop my writing here, the seventh day. Yours Felisol


I'll summon up my story in the wonderful hymn by Sarah F. Adams.

Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
E’en though it be a cross that raiseth me,
Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee.

Refrain

Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee!

Though like the wanderer, the sun gone down,
Darkness be over me, my rest a stone.
Yet in my dreams I’d be nearer, my God to Thee.

Refrain

There let the way appear, steps unto Heav’n;
All that Thou sendest me, in mercy given;
Angels to beckon me nearer, my God, to Thee.

Refrain

Then, with my waking thoughts bright with Thy praise,
Out of my stony griefs Bethel I’ll raise;
So by my woes to be nearer, my God, to Thee.

Refrain

Or, if on joyful wing cleaving the sky,
Sun, moon, and stars forgot, upward I’ll fly,
Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee.

Refrain

There in my Father’s home, safe and at rest,
There in my Savior’s love, perfectly blest;
Age after age to be, nearer my God to Thee.

Refrain

Childhood and youth with Jesus

Day six

As far as I can remember I have been a believer, a child of God, living by grace.
I learned to pray even before I could speak, my first song was about that little boat which Jesus is steering.

My Dad taught me how to write at the age of three. We were travelling for 6 hours by boat to see the eye-doctor. He has been my idol all my life. My Mom would teach us all the songs and prayers from her childhood.


I went to Sunday school, to Bible classes, music group, knitting group, I was a scout and even a Christian "russ" (the ones celebrating finishing gymnasium).
My Dad wrote in my poetry book the very best words he could give me on my road in life. Proverbs 4:²³" Above all else, guard your heart,
for everything you do flows from it. "
I admit at the time I was a bit embarrassed; at the age of 7, roses are red and violets are blue.. But I was even more shy to hurt my Dad by saying anything. I knew he wrote from love. Later on he would write the same words in Serina's poetry book. She felt like me.

Sunday school in the wintertime 1958. We went for 2 1/2 kilometers to come to Salem.

I lived by grace, I still do. I also did my share of sins, and I must admit; I still do. Ephesians 2: ⁸ " For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— ⁹ not by works, so that no one can boast."
That still is me. I need his grace more each day.

Being raised by Pentecostal parents was special in a country where at that time 95% of the population belonged to the Church of Norway. ( Now the number has sunk to 82 %).

The kitting mission girls on a sleepover tour.


The good thing was that everybody in the neighbourhood went to our Sunday School, in that way we were not outcasts. Our congregation had the liveliest songs, the most inspiring Sunday School teachers and top Christmas and summer celebrations where parents also loved to participate, Christians or not. A low threshold and lots and lots of love and engagement.

Sunday school summer of 1955.



When it came to cinema, teen magazines, dancing, cosmetics, even jewellery my parents run a tight ship. I remember hour long discussions over why it was a sin to wear earrings, but not fingerings or necklaces. I think I won the discussion, but not the right to wear them.

Scout camp. Was I proud of my new hat!


I actually had to change friends several times in my teens, because my parents would not let me follow them where they went.
Today I see much of what they did was right, and nothing was done to dominate me, but to protect me.

I have to admit; summer camps also meant meeting with new species of the opposite sex.


I was very young when I asked my Dad, "Do only members from the Pentecostal Church come to heaven?" I've never forgotten his answer or the broad horizon it gave me. His face went suddenly very serious and intense. " You must never think anything like that, Kitty." He found his big Bible and read to me from
John 3:¹⁶ "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." (NIV) "We belong to the Pentecostal Church because there we find what we think is the right practice of the word of God. We both know people going to the Methodist Church, the Baptist Church, the Salvation Army, the Chapels and the Church of Norway. They all believe that Jesus is the Son of God and therefore shall have eternal life."I think I was about seven when my Dad held his speech about salvation, and ever since I have known we are all sisters and brothers in the Lord, not only in a church.

We had confirmation too. Gathered once a week to study the Bible with the minister. I guess I gave him a hard time with all my questions. Afterwards there was a celebration and new clothes. I'm 14 here, but felt like a lady.


What also helped convincing me about the word from Romans 10:¹³ for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”,was that the Christians in Sauda at least twice a year would gather in the big and neutral Theatre for common meetings. Again; making a low threshold to gather people for Christ..
Why do I love the Scarf Sisters? They all have this genuine love of Jesus and the same low threshold.

Once I had chosen my friends among the Christians, my youth was pretty easy and straightforward. Everybody knew everybody in my little home town of 6000 inhabitants. I would occasionally ditch a French lesson to sit with the girls on the local cafe, eating waffles and playing Blueberry Hill with Louis Armstrong on the jukebox. But I would never cheat in school or do anybody harm. Oh, i do have to admit; in my early youth we went out stealing apples or plums in the autumn darkness, it was called slang. I did it for the excitement, not of need, and I felt ashamed afterwards.

I'd never miss the Christmas celebration at Salem. As I grew older I volunteered in the kitchen, but came up to walk around the tree in my oh, so short lilac flower dress.

I guess I've always loved a fresh discussion at home in school and in church. I was raised in a mix of fundamental belief and challenging brain wrestling. Whenever I had a question I felt free to ask and talk it through. I was never forced into anything, my parents were living examples and prayers. a favourite of my father and also mine is this from the Phillipians 4:⁶ "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. "

Isn't that a wonderful thing? We are challenged to pour our hearts out and every little worry to God. He hasn't said we'll always get what we want, but what we need, above all the peace of God to guard our hearts and minds.
I can still hear my father praying and thanking for everything. It often took an hour before he went to sleep. Then he had unburdened his mind and placed his worries where they belonged; with our Heavenly Father.

In my youth I participated on summer camps, prayer meetings and crusades as one of eight adolescences keeping together. The question about baptism came up, obe of the leaders was particularly eager. My parents never said anything, they knew I had learned that I had to choose by myself. I must admit I had an aversion about becoming a scalp in that youth leader's belt. I claimed I was saved and did not need to get baptised to get to heaven. I listed up lots of Bible quotes to confirm my view. 1 Peter 3:21baptism being but the pledge of a clear conscience toward God.
I guess I had heard so many arguments against baptism of children, that I now felt the same arguments were valid for baptism of grown ups.
At a summer camp the year I had left Senior High lots of youths were going to become baptised. A friend of mine challenged me to join in. I said once more how I felt about this, and that I didn't understand. "You don't need to understand Elise", she said, "it's simply an act of obedience towards God." She quoted the mission command of Jesus Matthew 28:18 "Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. ¹⁹ Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”


That made the trick to me. I didn't need to understand, I needed to follow orders and do what I could not understand. I took the plunge in my bright yellow summer dress, and have never turned back.

Hi sisters! Please shoot up a quick prayer for Collin. I think we may be on our way to getting a diagnosis for him... Asperger's is looking like where we are going, still some time away. This would be a good thing! I'm not 100% if this is gonna stick but it's a start. Asking for prayers to clearly hear God's direction in this.
Thanks.
Becky

Lifelong happiness through salvation

Day five



God's timing is always perfect. To me it has been a blessing to meditate over God's love to our family, while using all my strength and time to nurse and care around my mother. The stars are always best visible in the darkness.
I've done a lot of star counting lately.
There was an election in Norway yesterday and recently the ten year anniversary for the tragic 9/11 in the USA. I have neither had time nor strength to blog about that.

How my parents met.
I've told that my Granddad went on the meetings at the Pentecostal Church in Sauda. My mother came to Sauda to work as a maid and a cook during the war. She brought her guitar with her and joined the string musicians in the church.
My Granddad must have seen her and liked what he heard about her. Suddenly one day he asked her if she could come to his household and cook for a fortnight while my step-grandma was on vacation. My mother agreed to help him out. It so happened that my dad, who was away on school, happened to be home just those days. He told me, he fell in love at first sight, my mother was more reluctant; He wasn't saved.
Those days they kept strictly to Paul's words from 2 Chor 6:¹⁴ "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"(NIV)

So much in love.

Anyway the attraction unmistakenly was there. My Dad would sit around admiring anything my Mom did, even if it was mending socks. "Oh, is this the way it's to be done? I just draw a thread through like this.."

My Dad had to return to the gymnasium in Oslo. There he searched the Philadelphia congregation, bended his knees and got baptised.

My Granddad crossed the street in Sauda and told my Mom smilingly, "Now Arne is saved, and everything is fixed!" This was in 1944, ten years after my Grandmother died.

My Dad was to be presented to my Mom's family at Jaeren. The war had been going on for almost five years. There was a shortage on everything. My Mom's wearing thick home knit stockings. She had made my father's as well.

Not long afterwards they became an item, later engaged and married in 1948.Indeed a match made in heaven. They were not spared for adversities or sickness, but in all those years I never heard them quarrel. My Mom sometimes went sour and silent, my Dad once kicked a bucket and exclaimed "Oh, women!" Otherwise they loved and admired each other and were generous with praise and nice words.

My Mom as a bride. Four sisters wore that same wedding gown.

Even till the end, the last 4 years when my father was tied to a wheelchair, he'd ask my Mom, "Do yo still love me?" She would smilingly hug him and confirm, "I'll always love you."

Gold wedding celebration.

My Dad taught me by his example the need to read the Bible. He himself regularly read 2 chapters a day and thus read the entire Bible through 34 times.

About my Mom he quoted Proverbs 31:³⁰ "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised."
"But you, you are both", he'd add contented.

How my Grandmother won the battle

Day four

My Grandfather Ljung came from Sweden. His father was a coachman on a great manor and my grandfather know how to drive a horse team and ride the horses before he was seven. Grandpa told some hideous stories about racing on an icy lake at that age. His Mom Johanna was a Godly woman and taught her 6 children the way to eternal life. Her children, especially the boys, were a pretty wild bunch and even though they had great respect for my great grandmother, they were not as pious as their mother. My granddad went to serve in the military. He was of course placed in the cavalry, and got special training with the Swedish elite storm-troopers together with his brother Svend. About that time Svend died in a road accident, and that made my grandfather turn to God again. His whole life he was greatly concerned about his brother's eternal life and prayed God for mercy for Svend's soul.

Grandfather Erik Herman Ljung as a dragoon.

About the time Norway got her independence, 1905, my granddad worked for a Swedish duchess. There he met this wonderful very young Norwegian nanny, Jenny Othilie Brath, who later was to become his wife.
She was a true Christian and very open and frank about her belief.
She once stood in the kitchen making food for the children and sung hymns of a full heart. "Jenny must not yell scream in the kitchen," the duchess reprimanded her. "I am not yell screaming, I'm singing about Jesus," my grandmother bravely answered.
She was commanded to follow the children to the theatre, which in grandmother Jenny's view was sinful. She had to obey orders, "but I kept my eyes closed all the time," she told afterwards.

Mother of my father; Jenny Othilie. My grandfather used to place us in front of this picture. "Look children, this is your grandmother, like she was when I first met her. Was she not pretty?

They moved to Norway and got 24 years and 6 children together. A girl, Edith, died at the age of 2 of diphtheria. My grandparents were heart broken. At first my grandfather was employed by Loewenskiold, the equerry of the Norwegian King Haakon's stables. Funny that the dragoon who was standing by the Norwegian border in 1904 ready for battle, now served in the stables of the Norwegian court.
My granddad was a bit of an adventurer. He learned how to drive a car in 1915, and moved with his little family to Sauda where the Americans was setting up a giant steel production plant. (which is still running and making a solid profit.) At first he worked as a coachman for the developer, but then he got himself a small farm and a car for cab driving. Later on he also founded a bus company, which came to provide a living for him and his sons. Meanwhile my grandmother got asthmatic from the toxic fuses of the factory. She had a maid to help her out, but run the household firmly. She also searched eagerly for spiritual food, in the chapel, at the Salvation Army and finally anchored up with the newly arrived Pentecostal Church. Both she and my only aunt got baptised there in Salem Congregation.

The Ljung family in Sauda. Behind from the left my uncle Rolf, aunt Elly and uncle Kaare are standing. Grandmother Jenny Othilie, my dad. uncle Leif and my granddad Erik Herman are sitting.


Meanwhile the times were getting hard all over the world after the Wall Street crash. My grandfather, who was strong as a bull, rolled the gas barrels from the key to his garage to save a quarter. Grandmother Jenny got weaker all the time, my granddad built her a tiny hut in the mountains, that the air must be cleaner and easier for her to breathe in. All in vain. She died in the winter of -34 after coming home from a meeting , "lung fire" it was called. The family was devastated. The cornerstone of the family home was gone. Did they fall apart? No, on the contrary. One by one they were won for eternity, baptised members of the Salem Congregation. My grandfather went to the meetings, but could not give up eating snuff, moist powdered tobacco. (He had done that since the age of 6.) Therefore they wouldn't let him get baptised. He never felt bitter about it, but steadily followed his children to meetings. The last one to getting saved was my dad. I will tell more about that tomorrow.
I Chor 1:¹⁸ "For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God."

Rebel for Christ

Day three

My mother was seventh child in her family. When she was 9 month, my grandmother became pregnant again, and this time very ill. Inga Serina baby (my Mom)was sent to live with her aunt's family and there she had a most wonderful childhood. Her uncle was schoolteacher, verger and fore-singer in the church. Her cousins were much older, so my little Mom was well taken care of, maybe even a little spoilt. She kept in touch with her maternal family, where my grandfather meanwhile had emigrated to Montana to earn money for a new farm. As my Mom reached the age of school start, her aunt, felt that the bonds between my Mom and her were so tight, she asked my grandmom for permission to adopt my Mom. Grandmom Serina refused promptly, even though she now had given birth to a son and a daughter while my mother was away.

Very much against her will my Mom was returned to a poorer and more insecure living. When she asked why, my Grandmom would only answer; "Blood is thicker than water." (Nevertheless the two sisters, my granny and my grand aunt stayed close friends all of their lives.)

From left behind, my uncle Kaare, aunt Liv, in front uncle Leif and my mother.

Grandmom Serina rented a cottage near the church for herself and the children. At the age of 14 my mother finished 7 years of elementary school. Time for confirmation and then out to search for work. That's when my Mom said her NO, that shook the entire family. She would not have a confirmation, on the contrary, she had decided to be baptised in a lake nearby with the Pentecostal congregation. The Lutheran Minister and my Grandmom tried to talk her out of it, but in vain. My granddad wrote from America, he would rather see his daughter dead, than become a member of the "rechristeners" as they were called in Norway. My oldest aunt came biking over 30 miles and threatened to kill my mother. My mother stood alone, but she stood firm.

My mother at the age of 14 ready to become baptised standing to the right.

Later, much later, my mother was the one everybody would turn to in times of sorrow and trouble, she spoke in funerals and was a support to anybody who needed a helping hand.
The members of the Pentecostal congregation were mocked everywhere as outcasts. My mother stood firm. My grandmother sent her younger son Leif to sit outside the meeting house called Zion to protect my Mom on her way home. They were bosom-buddies, and my uncle sat on the staircase outside waiting for my Mom.
This was the brother she lost three weeks ago.

The rest of the Pentecostal congregation of the day of my mother's baptism.

I once asked my mother, "How could you be so stubborn and rebellious?"
"How could I not," my Mom replied , "I had met Jesus."
2 Chor5:¹³ If we are “out of our mind,” as some say, it is for God; if we are in our right mind, it is for you. ¹⁴ For Christ’s love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died. ¹⁵ And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again." (NIV)

Love to a thousand generations

Day two

In Norway generation Bibles are common. Every new member of the family branch was carefully written in on the front pages. Alas only the oldest son did inherit that family heirloom. After my dad there are to large Bibles, one for each child. What's more important we know we are inscribed in our Heavenly Father's big book, and that we thereby have his promise of "love to a thousand generations". ( Exodus 20:6)How great is that??

You may know that all the countries of Scandinavia have a Reformed Lutheran Church as the official churches in their countries. They are supported by the government and also taught in school. (82% of the Norwegians belong to the Church of Norway.) There have always been lay revivals within the church and I live in a part of Norway, which because of its pietism has been called "The Black Mainland".
What once was a safe and loving environment has slowly but steadily become secularized. I feel sorry about that, but still blessed because of my forefathers love of God , which is bringing love to a thousand generations.

I do not know a lot about my great grand parents' Christian life, but even more about my grandparents' personal choice to live with God.

Here's my grandmother Serina, a proud farmer's girl who went to high school and amongst others taught to make this bunad, national costume, herself. (The bunad was made in 1903 and our daughter Serina is the lucky owner of it now.)
My grandmother was a small, 4foot 9, but happy and skilled woman. First on the dance floor and last one to leave, she used to tell.
Then the great revival came and she came to think that a lot of her "old" life was a sin. To play a fiddle, an accordion, even to whistle was a sin. Whistling meant calling out for the devil one preacher had taught. She loved the church, her husband and her nine children, and by and by she learned to find loopholes in the too strict religion. She would play any game with her children as long as there were no ordinary cards (poker cards) involved. She would use Vaseline one her eyebrows and eyelids, vaseline couldn't possibly be a sin. On her elder days she loved a good perfume. "It's the elderly who need to dress up. The youths are dressed up by being themselves," she used to say.

My mother's parents married in 1910. She choose a Godly man, Christian, from a small farm in the inland. Together they raised 9 children for worse and for good in sickness and in health. My grandpa two periods crossed the pond, to work in Montana, making money to buy land in Norway.
He once lost his farm in the great deprssion, because he had guaranteed for a loan for an elder brother. The brother came to own two farms, my grandfather had to leave wife and 8 children behind, taking the eldest son with him over to Montana again.
My mother tell grandma wore no bitterness, but worked had to provide for her children. She did a lot of knitting both by hand and by machine and sold her products on the market in Stavanger. I still remember her knitting by hand, holding the work in her lap while reading in an open book laying upon the table. Every minute counted.
Even so she never lost her faith or her heavenly goal. She used to quote Exodus 20:3 "Thou shalt not have no other gods before me". She worried about her children being to focused on materialism and the evil god Mammon. Today we all can realize how much we have lost in the search for wealth and success instead of gathering treasures where rust does not corrupt.
Matthew 6 :19 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, ²⁰ but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹ For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.


The summer of 1951. Eight siblings gathered at my grandparents "new" farm. We spent some wonderful summers here and share beautiful memories. We often were about 20 adults and children gathered around the huge kitchen table. The ninth brother, Bjørn, is on the picture standing between my grandparents. He's wearing an American soldier uniform.
Three of my mother's siblings went to live in the USA, so I have a bunch of first cousins scattered over North America. My mother and my grandmother were the only ones never to visit the New World.

Bible and circumstances

Day one.
The Bible of the sisterhood arrived today, just as we were gathered in the kitchen for lunch, my Mom sitting in a wheel chair by my side and Gunnar on the other side of the table.
The package had to be opened at once. There among several biblical treasure lay the book of life, the Holy Bible of the Sisterhood.
I had to explain thoroughly to my Mom once more about the Sisterhood and the Bible being passed round the world to 29 sisters.

"Aren't you lucky!"my Mom exclaimed, and I realized, that is just what we
both were.

God is teaching us all new lessons these days. My Mom had a severe heart attack 2 weeks ago, and spent 10 days in hospital. The first days our small core family was gathered, brother Kel, Serina, Gunnar and I. We were even given our own private room to lay down for some rest in between the wake.
My mother was cut off all life support, nutrition and medication and all monitors and wheeled into a silent room, while they waited for her life to end. I started at once asking her if she wanted water, she managed to say yes. We found a short straw and for 36 hours we feed her with water, crums of milk chocolate and Coca Cola. The doctors finally reconsidered the situation and put her on weak heart medication, allergy pills end energy beverage. To put a eleven days story short, my Mom was "released" to live with us, a hospital bed, wheelchair etc., nurses 5 times a day, palliative nursing they call it.
Godgiven days, I call it, and who's to say whether my Mom will live a fortnight or a decade. It's all in the hands of of our Saviour, and that's what we all have come to peace with these tough 15 days. Never has the song nearer my God to thee meant more. We have been praying almost without stop. Not that my Mom's life should be prolonged, but that she should have no pains, anxiety or discomfort. This is also why she's staying with us instead of in a nursing home.

We are blessed to live in a rich country in which even ordinary people get the best treatment for free. A hospital bed with a decubitus mattress was provided, likewise a wheelchair, a roller, bathroom equipment and two nurses coming 5 times a day.

My Mom is getting stronger and happier day by day. She is of course mourning after loosing two siblings in less than two weeks. But she does remember what she has shared of good days with them, and she's kept her short time memory and remembers her losses as well.
All the morphine she was given at first has made her a bit confused, but as the toxins are washed out of her body, she' stabilizing. She has had a couple of nasty falls, therefore the wheelchair. I have a good hope she might get out of it again too. One broken hip is what she must live with, she's too weak for an op.

Short introduction...
AS I opened the Bible I asked my Mom, "What is your favourite word in the Bible?" (I guess I thought of verse, but this is how the conversation went.)
"Grace", she said without hesitation.
"Oh, fine,"I nodded, "By grace we are saved."
"Grace over grace,"my Mom added.
This is how the verse from John 1: 26 is translated in the Norwegian Bible.
^{John 1:16} "And of his fullness we have all received, and grace for grace."